Thoughts on… entitlement [long read]

I always wanted to write on this topic. Recently I noticed that the notion of entitlement is becoming more prevalent, especially among the younger generation (the millennial I would say). But I am afraid to touch upon it because it is (1) a sensitive topic, (2) definitely would come across as me being very subjective – well, the topic itself is subjective – and (3) it is only based on my personal observations and isn’t supported by any research, scientific or otherwise. On the last point, there may have been some actual research or studies done on it, but I wouldn’t know about it because I don’t run in academic circles and have no access to such knowledge.

Anyhow, this topic presented itself to the public, through a very public channel (Facebook in this instance) in the form of a complaint against a local Starbucks outlet (in Singapore) posted by a young girl. Well, complaints made in Facebook are far too common (and some really trivial) to merit any proper notice. However, what caught the public eye (and their ire), in this case, was that the complaint is unwarranted. Cue the social media backlash. When I first read the complaint (courtesy of Straits Times Online), I was clueless and annoyed as to why she felt that way and I am glad to find out that I was not the only one.

Before I launch into my er… musings… let us all agree (and I’m sure none would disagree) that Starbucks is a public place for the public to go to nurse their coffee/Frappucino/mocha latte cravings for as long as they want. As long as you’re seated there and have a Starbucks drink in hand, the staff will most likely not chase you out. Same goes for most cafes and eating places I believe.

Now, before I go on, I am just musing down here. I am not against the girl (I don’t know her) and this is not a personal attack on anyone. Besides, the storm has blown over (as all storms eventually do) and the girl has made a public apology. So hurray, the earth still stands.

What I’m curious about is the reasoning behind her actions. I believe that age has a part to play, and at a young age, there is the lack of knowledge of how the world works. But most importantly, I believe that it is also the sense of entitlement that plays a big role in her actions.

Let’s start with her age. I am not sure how old she is exactly, but I know that she is a student and part of what is called the “Strawberry Generation” or “Gen Y-ers”. The main idea for the “strawberry” part of the name comes from the softness of the fruit, to simplify; this generation is unable to go through hardships because they are too “soft” and bruise easily. This generation consists of those born between 1981 and 1991. In that case, I am of the “Strawberry Generation” too. But, also, this is the generation in which families are more affluent, with parents who worked and earned, who provide more than just the basic food and shelter, and who will usually yield to their children’s whims and fancies. So this generation grew up sheltered, protected, well-fed and well-clothed, all without the need to worry where it all comes from. So when there is hardship, it is thought (quite rightly) that this “soft” and easily bruised generation will not be able to cope and ride it out.

Therefore, I do believe that this girl’s young age contributed to her very public problem. 

As I mentioned before, I found the notion of entitlement to be especially prevalent in the younger generation. This point, however, is arguable of course.

Let’s look at the concept of entitlement. Entitlement is defined by Merriam Webster online dictionary as “the condition of having a right to have, do, or get something” and “the feeling or belief that you deserve to be given something (such as special privileges)”.  I believe that’s what the younger generation are being brought up with. While it’s true that you have a right to live life the way you wanted it, and not as society dictates, you still have to be abide by some societal norms (basic manners, really). This differs from what the generations before (especially in a rather conservative Asian society) were taught, in that life follows a certain path, a tried-and-tested one if you will. Follow that path and you will live a bearably comfortable life. Follow that path and you would be considered successful in life. People were taught to want nothing, to ask for nothing and to expect nothing. Being alive is a success in itself. If you had a job, earned money, had a car to drive around, you have done well in life. Any, and all, excess is considered a ‘bonus’. No one feels entitled to all these privileges.

However, entitlement seems to be the byword for the young these days and some are taking its meaning a bit too far. They feel entitled to almost anything and everything. It seems that they tie this feeling of entitlement to having money and status. They feel entitled to the right to speak up against injustice or mistreatment, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but these days the lines between right and wrong, black and white, aren’t so clear anymore. I have a feeling that what they deem ‘wrong’ or ‘unfair’ might be skewed.

This feeling of entitlement goes hand in hand with another prevalent notion – immediate gratification, in which what you want is what you must and most of the time, will, get immediately. Herein lies an even bigger issue that the generations now and after have, the idea that you must get what you want and to get it instantly. It’s a dangerous notion. I believe we have progressed too fast and gotten too efficient. The result is that we now suffer from a lack of patience and acceptance. Also, whenever we are unhappy or feel that we are unfairly treated, we take to social media (almost immediately with no thinking through) to air our complaints, another offshoot of the immediate gratification issue.

Therefore, I believe that it is the combination of young age and the idea of entitlement that led the young girl to believe that she had every right to that seat because her bag was there, even though she’s not (and to take to social media to air her displeasure – immediate gratification anyone?). And also to believe that stepping away from your belongings for at least half an hour is acceptable and that she will return to find her seat and her belongings still intact. I mean, COME ON? Common sense dictates that you should never leave your belongings lying around. 

‘Nuff said.