Approaching the end of 2021

2021 is coming to an end. 

In the past when I still kept a blog, I used to do an end-year post to reflect on the year that has passed and what I have achieved. Honestly, I enjoyed the introspective aspect of it and thinking about what has taken place in the year. But whenever it came to writing what I've achieved, I get anxious. My immediate thought (always) is, "Nothing, I've done nothing worth noting or mentioning. I think I've wasted an entire year again without doing anything significant. What a waste of time." 

This time, I thought I'll be more gracious with myself. Let's be honest, nothing is going to change for 2022 and I'll probably be doing the same old things as 2021. So I'm going to honour my mini achievements and small wins. 

#1

I think the biggest thing that happened to me was that I lived on my own now. I bought my own place (ok, I concede that this is a major achievement) and I moved in at the end of August. It's been about four months going on five now, and I am still enjoying it. The big discovery is that I really enjoy having my own space. Sure, there will be times of loneliness, but I don't feel isolated or cut off. My place is my sanctuary - to be who I am and do what I want. It's the solitude that I sought. It's not that I want to be alone all the time, or that I shun people, but most of the time, I liked to be alone. It's an extension of my introverted nature. 

#2

Cooking. I discovered that I can cook! Not that I'm MasterChef standards (not even close), but I can cook sufficiently well. I can also cook daily, despite the hassle of washing up after. Some people like to cook, but because of the washing up, they only do it on the weekends. Therefore I think being able to cook daily is an achievement in itself. I count that as a win. In 2022, I'm going to start going deeper into Japanese recipes. 

#3

I think I've read more in 2021 than I did in previous years. I love reading. Really enjoyed it. This is why my degree is in English language and literature. But over the years, with work, Netflix, and a whole host of digital distractions, reading fell by the wayside. It's not that I consciously wanted to read more, but because I had more time on my hands (after withdrawing from social media, plus work from home is such a boon for work-life balance), I read more. It's not physical books though - my "to be read" pile hasn't dwindled at all - it's almost all audiobooks and e-books. Being able to loan out e-books from my local library and sync them to my e-reader is the best thing ever! Now I have SO MUCH choices. But in 2022, I decided that I should start clearing my "to be read" pile. I hope to be able to read 10 books (at least). 

#4

Kept serving in my church's Cell Guide Writing ministry. Personally, 2021 was a trying time serving for that ministry. It's my third year in the ministry and at this point, I had run out of questions to ask. One of the main tasks in writing cell guides is to ask questions that would provoke members into deep thought, compel them to act, resolve to change and apply the sermon in their daily lives. It was getting very difficult for me to come out with good questions, and most of the time I fall back to simple uninspirational ones. I also felt that my heart wasn't in it anymore. It had become routine, mechanical, and, dare I say it, boring. Now I'm wondering if I should take a break from the ministry. I will take it to the Lord and follow His will for me. 

I think this is it for me. Four mini achievements and small wins. There could be more, but this is enough for me. 

Here's to a better 2022 :)